You're On Your Own, Kid You Always Have Been
Our Journey Through Taylor Swift's Midnights— On Facing Your Flaws and Not Asking the Right Questions
The TGIF lineup differs from our sincerely piqued interest in frivolous diversions during these politically wild and tumultuous times— only without celebrity worship. This week we stay up for our journey through Taylor Swift’s Midnights. Get into it below.
When Taylor Swift announced she was coming out with an album called Midnights, I thought the queen of singing about midnight had finally written an album for all of us who think the same thing late at night: am I the bad guy? It’s not necessarily about being good vs. evil–it’s more complicated than that. Many of us feel safest at night, alone, when we are most vulnerable because we are forced to live with ourselves. Being alone at midnight is when the most convoluted questions come to mind, on topics that range from wanting to leave a small town to eventually thinking about death. We face our fears this time of night with no armor or distractions. Midnight is also about accepting your flaws, as much as you want to believe you are truly a good person. Sometimes, it’s hard to find the silver lining. Going into this album, I thought I would come out of it understanding a new part of the mosaic we call ourselves. Unfortunately, I still couldn’t quite make any pieces fit.
Both folklore and evermore blew away all of my expectations from this album, as it’s Taylor returning to that autobiographical formula that she’s masterfully orchestrated with storytelling throughout the years. I was ready all over again, except this time with her continuing journey to pop. I shouldn’t have expected an evermore album from a completely new idea in a different genre— that was my mistake. Midnights could’ve and should’ve still had the depth Taylor has conceptualized over the years in her writing. However, it just… didn’t.
Starting with Anti-Hero, the song’s title is intriguing. When I think of antiheroes, I think of Deadpool, Frank Castle, Wanda Maximoff, Jack Sparrow— and so many more. These characters have in common that they are good to an extent but deeply flawed and chaotically corrupt to different degrees. These are very damaged people who were good, but the world has chewed them up and spit them out as hardened, shelled people. Yet, they at least try to make somewhat good choices. So, I thought Anti-Hero would have the same level of depth attached to a dark pop medley— and we got the complete opposite. The song’s complex subject matter means more than a reference to people looking like “sexy babies,” and it’s not that Anti-Hero is a bad song— it’s just not what I expected from someone who wrote the lyrics to “my tears ricochet”— Anti-Hero wishes it was the protagonist in that song!
Question…? had so much potential in the name by itself than what the lyrics ended up being. When I think of asking questions at midnight, I think of asking someone questions that get to the root of who they are as a person— Do you believe in aliens? If you could live in another country, which would it be? If you had the chance, the money, the means, would you run away from your current life? Taylor’s musical Question…? gave us more of the same when first introduced to Taylor’s composition by asking, “Did you ever have someone kiss you in a crowded room? And every single one of your friends was making fun of you? But fifteen seconds later, they were clapping too?” I mean… I suppose this is subjective to something that happened in Taylor’s life, but I was anticipating something more existential and less coy.
Taylor’s known for her thoughtful and chronicling lyrics, yet these two narrative worlds of glittering pop and melancholy folk-pop didn’t give us the Holy Grail of albums. We saw glimpses of the new songs, which weren’t announced until 3 am on October 21st by debuting on the deluxe version of the album Midnights (3 am Edition). I thought the most intellectual and deep songs were songs that were scrapped from the original lineup.
Aside from The Great War, perfectly blending pop and self-reflection, the song feels like it belongs to a completely different album other than Midnights. The inconsistency is felt with Paris, which feels out of place— almost out of the left field since we’re so used to Taylor singing about her nights in New York City. The imbalance didn’t help me relate, and relating to art in some way is crucial.
Besides my disappointment, a few songs did it for me in terms of hitting the mark on melody, lyrics, and overall vibe. Songs like You’re on Your Own, Kid is a nostalgic song that makes me think of my childhood and the smallest things that used to mean the world to me, like getting my crush’s attention in language arts. It reminded me of friendships I’ve lost and situations I’ve had to face alone at such a young age. It’s a harsh reminder that, ultimately, the only person you can ever rely on is yourself.
Midnight Rain is about accepting and being alright with your deserved selfishness because you know you sometimes have to choose yourself.
There’s also the track Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve— which I have to mention because this song is for every impressionable young girl who feels safe letting the supposed cool older guy convince her she’s young while giving her attention will relate. The lyrics are compelling because maybe we’ve all been that girl— sure of herself but blinded with naiveté with the purity of being young and not knowing much about love— or what we thought was love. Then being emotionally torn apart by said the manipulative older guy just because he knew you’d believe him, with lyrics like “if clarity’s in death, then why won’t this die?” and “Give me back my girlhood, it was mine first,” say it all. The harsh truth is you never forget the first guy who took advantage of you. They left an imprint on you, taking it with you to the next guy you meet and comparing the red flags. It’s the biggest lesson you take with you and possibly the cruelest because you can never take time back— but you gain your power over time.
Bejeweled is a stunning song about regaining confidence and being seen as more than just desirability or arm candy. Karma has many metaphors for karma since it’s more than just what goes around comes around. Taylor’s lyrical version of Karma embodies that karma’s all about energy, so despite what my enemies have put me through— despite what they tried to paint me by numbers with character assassination, nice things still deservingly happen. For instance, my loving boyfriend. Or the stillness of the weekends, when the wind is perfect enough in this fall chill. It’s my cat purring and reminding me that I am worth all of this, and I sleep easy knowing that the people who tried to tarnish and emotionally hurt me— karma’s always a spectator in this game of life. It’s a song about defiance, yet despite the anthemic message, it could have been a bigger theme for Midnights. Personally, and regardless of all these flaws, I still take on the best I can every day.
Taylor Swift’s Midnights is out globally via Republic Records. Stream HERE.
🧊 Mini Pop Culture Round-Up
Pop culture moments are inevitable whether we engage; celebrity speculation is a full-fledged spectator sport to us, regular folks, with mindless pop culture nonsense— escapism is well-deserved. Here’s the pop culture round-up we can’t get away from— or enough of, seemingly.
And just like that… Giselle Bundchen is legally a single lady— as the iconically memorable Lucille Bluth once said, good for her.
The incomparable and forever favorite, Leslie Jordan, passed away. Then suddenly, the skies were grey everywhere.
The legendary Shelley Duvall returns to our screens via Deadline.
Ryan Murphy says he reached out to the family and friends of Jeffrey Dahmer’s victims but never got a response— girl, read the room via THR.
Photograph by Steven Meisel, 1992. Last weekend, Madonna reflected on her impactful and trailblazing book, SEX, in 1992 via Instagram— the only problem is her retrospection paints the white feminist narrative by claiming to be the one to have paved the way for sexual liberation. Madonna then implies she walked; therefore, women like Miley Cyrus, Kim Kardashian, and Cardi B can run. A mighty outlandish thing to say, considering innovators like Grace Jones and Donna Summer paved their way in glitter, sweat, and incredible stylistic taste in 1975.
Grace Jones broke barriers with a powerful look and attitude to back up her words. Her ability to ambiguously transform by channeling her feminine and masculine energy alternatively. Meanwhile, my mother’s favorite disco goddess and Christian-turned-supposed naughty girl, Donna Summer, gifted the world with a powerhouse track. Love to Love You Baby famously features audio representations of orgasms via various moanings. Summer listed the iconic Mahalia Jackson (as many others, and rightfully so) as her inspiration growing up, so there’s no denying Madonna’s crucial contributions to sex positivity broke through many glass ceilings even still because sexuality and being sexy are ageless. However, she broke the cardinal rule— never to take flowers from a fellow Diosa or overlooked communities. In a true Cardi B manner, she replied to Madonna via Twitter in a series of now-deleted tweets, and all Swarovski crystal ostrich feathers have since been smoothed over. - Naomi
⏳ Retro Fixation
As the 2000s resurgence continues, Chloe Cherry is now a Madden Girl. While she’d be fantastic for Moschino or Miu Miu, seeing her star in fashion campaigns is good. The latest rework is Steve Madden returning their iconic ‘Big Heads’ adverts of my youth— complete with the t-strap mary-janes that I remember fondly. - Naomi
Where has October gone? The seasonality of the spooky season has finally settled in as the vibe fits the weather, but now the month is practically gone. Halloween has always been a forbidden fruit from a strict religious upbringing, but my love for a themed event or costume trumps conditioned judgments and rigid childhood beliefs. However, an important day for remembrance follows Halloween, and after this past year— it’ll be bittersweet and curative. Releasing the past to move forward is always the highest reward of our self-discovery. What absolute horseshit.
Con Amor,
Naomi x